Curiosity Kills

January 21, 2018 § Leave a comment

Last Week, I have a look in a movie where Jeff Fahey plays a blind former police officer and mention The Sketch Artist II since that movie has Courteney Cox as a blind person so it makes sense that I’m reviewing another movie related to that by having Jeff and Courteney star in this as well. And believe me when I say that this movie is surprisingly hard to find but I found it and am looking at it anyway. Curiosity Kills is a 1990 movie starring C. Thomas Howell and this is not the only time he stars with Jeff since they later sort-of collaborate again in 1996’s The Sweeper. I say “sort-of” because yeah, they are both in it but they don’t share scenes together. Will explain that movie eventually because that one is really insane.

It’s directed by Colin Bucksey who is more known for TV works with shows like Breaking Bad and Fargo, that and he won awards for his work. The two writers of this movie also has good credits with both Joe Batteer and John Rice being best known for writing Windtalkers and Blown Away. Okay, maybe I do lie that I have more to talk about this director last week but hey, even next week’s movie has a little checking on the director and writers so this is really an easy month for me to look at who’s involved in each movie.

C. Thomas Howell plays Cat Thomas, a janitor and a photographer living his life while planning to move to Miami with his fashion model girlfriend Gwen (Courteney Cox). He and his neighbor Jane (Rae Dawn Chong) discovers their friend and neighbor Harry (Lawrence Dobkin) died by suicide in bath but when actor Matthew Manus (Jeff Fahey) moves in to Harry’s apartment, Cat is then suspicious since he discovered that Matthew is planned to move to the same apartment before Harry’s “suicide” and he and Jane investigates on whether Matthew is a good guy or not.

And obviously, Matthew is not since he’s not an actor at all but a killer who has connections even to a member of the police force. It took a long while before Cat and Jane had been found out and Matthew has to complete his job by getting Cat on the rooftop but he’s shot and Matthew’s informer (and crooked police captain) McGarrity (Richard Foronjy) appears on the scene and as Cat notices McGarrity’s cough, he is danger but Jane saved his life. The movie ends with Cat and Jane being more than just neighbors as they fell in love (and Gwen might be living in Miami or something, she left him after thinking Cat is cheating).

This movie plays out as a bit of early 90s retelling of Rear Window except that Cat is not in his wheelchair (or being house arrest like Shia’s character in Disturbia). It’s okay and they all did a good job. Jeff did play it menacingly while hiding it with his fake persona and I see C. Thomas Howell and Rae have chemistry which makes sense since they met in Soul Man and got married until after sometime after this movie is finished. There’s no minor parts except that it might be edited-for-television since that’s how I got my copy but worth checking out if possible.

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Blindsided

January 14, 2018 § Leave a comment

Hey, remember when I reviewed a movie where Jeff Fahey plays a sketch artist who helps a early fame Courtney Cox on a crime case even though she’s blind? Well, how about I should look at a movie where Jeff is not a sketch artist but he’s a ex-cop involved in a situation… that, and he’s temporarily blind! Believe it or not, this is not the only movie I’m reviewing this month that has a loose connection with The Sketch Artist II so do wait next week for another James Tolkien appearance. I’m kidding but hey, when you get a title like Blindsided, do you expect to be about something else?

Blindsided is directed by Thomas Michael Donnelly who does nothing much really. Yeah, it’s a bit anticlimactic. He did direct movies like Quicksilver starring Kevin Bacon and wrote stuff as well so that’s pretty much it. I think I more to talk about the director of next week’s movie than this one so what else do I say really? Not much but it gives a quick check before we get to the movie so let’s roll.

After stealing cash from an operation, Former police officer Frank McKenna (Jeff Fahey) and his friend Lee (Brad Hunt) attempt to complete their plan but Frank got shot in the back of his neck which although he survived, he became temporarily blinded. Staying at Mexico to get his sight back through operation, he met a mysterious lady known simply as Chandler Strange (Mia Sara) and they fall for each other before she went away leaving Frank to wonder what happen to her.

They eventually get to see each other again but their love is caught in a web of deception, murder and lies as she is revealed to be a lover of Jessy Aruna (Rudy Ramos) who was in charge of money laundering operation that Frank and Lee were involved in. And Frank now has to give almost all the money back to Jessy while hoping to achieve love with Chandler or let go of her after he discovered her secrets.

Now this movie is pretty good and has a noir kind of feel but admittedly, it felt like I’m also watching a 1990s Erotic Thriller that’s tone down to PG-13 viewing and really, it shows. The movie has sex but it’s not that graphic and violence that is painfully little violent. It makes sense since this is made for television but if you make this movie in the same timeframe as Basic Instinct and Sliver but not have the risky feel, there’s a bit of problem there.

Obviously Jeff is fine and the same goes for Mia Sara as a femme fatale which I have to wonder why I don’t see much of her beyond Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. The only other person good in this movie is the late, great Ben Gazzara as Frank’s former police partner and friend who helps Frank out even in troubled times. The movie is only worth checking out for the story and their acting alone. Nothing much beyond that really.

Silverado

January 7, 2018 § Leave a comment

Sigh, why did I made this pic above? I wish I have more time but anyway. Last year, I mentioned that I may look at this movie eventually and ain’t it obvious that I’m looking at it today. And honestly, this is a different start since I’m looking at a movie that is made by well-known screenwriter Lawrence Kasdan who practically needs no introduction. No really, any movie I might bring up is not even worth mentioning so you know what stuff he wrote or direct. Had I review a movie by Robert Rodriguez instead? I’ll basically copy and paste those words and get on to the movie straight away so what should I say about Lawrence that hasn’t been said? Well okay, he directed Dreamcatcher and it bears my mind that he’s the one who wrote that as well so yeah, time to move on from that Stephen King adaptation.

Even this movie itself would be tough to talk about since it’s one of the well-known movies he made back in that time and has a large cast that you know of like Jeff Goldblum, Kevin Kline, John Cleese, Kevin Costner, Scott Glenn, Danny Glover and even Brian Dennehy whom both he and Jeff later reunite in The Last Of The Finest. And this is probably sad enough because as much as it’s his first theatrical starring role, it’s him in a more supporting role. Basically, he plays a character that’s not a lead or secondary lead.

The movie starts off with Emmett (Scott Glenn) whom after he got ambushed by three man but survived. He decides to go to Silverado but not before he meets Paden (Kevin Kline) who’s left in the desert. They befriended each other and make a stop to a nearby town to discover that Emmett’s brother Jake (Kevin Costner) is in prison and sentenced to hanging by its town’s sheriff John Langston (John Cleese). Both Emmett and Paden encountered Mal (Danny Glover) and team-up to save Jake which they did the four formed a team that shows their friendship and survival.

After helping few settlers along the way, they arrived to the town that’s now “policed” by its sheriff and Paden’s old friend Cobb (Brian Dennehy) who has some shady history with him and his team including his right hand Tyree (Jeff Fahey) and later town arrival Slick (Jeff Goldblum). They pinpoint that he’s the one behind all this from Mal’s father being murdered to how Emmett got ambushed earlier and they bring him and his goons down before it gets worsen.

Despite the fact that Jeff hardly stars in it, it don’t matter really because this movie is indeed a western classic and made in the time when the genre is heading to its tough times with blockbuster films beginning to reign supreme. The genre managed to stood still and survive with movies like Unforgiven and Dead Man even though the genre diverges to different fields. I honestly can’t explain what’s good or bad about this movie except that it’s worth checking out. Scott Glenn sold as a lead rather than a supporting character that I seen him nowadays like Stick in Daredevil, Kevin Kline and Danny are already memorable and Kevin Costner whom I’m not much a fan of at least does well as wise cracking cowboy who has a heart.

The story is stunning, the action is well-directed and the acting is good even with John Cleese in one of his few non-comedic roles (and a much better role of his than The Day The Earth Stood Still remake if I may add). Oh, and Jeff Fahey? He’s role is minimal but good. Oddly enough, Jeff Goldblum also has a minimal role with him coming within the close of the second act and he gets top billing but maybe it’s because he became an it thing at the time with movies like The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai and Transylvania 6-5000. Makes sense since he became more known in The Fly the following year.

At least next few weeks is him at least being the star of the movie but other than that, do seek this movie if you haven’t seen it and anything Lawrence has done except Dreamcatcher… uh, I don’t know he is involved in that and he shouldn’t really but at least he’s still in business and deservingly so.

Best Of 2017

January 4, 2018 § Leave a comment

Getting to the good stuff and while I did say 2017 is not a bad year for me, 2018 may have started but it’s off to a bad start which I won’t get to since it’s personal but I’m trying to give it and make the show go on so no need to waste time and see what I like in the previous twelve months.

Movies

The Disaster Artist – You guys are familiar with Tommy Wiseau already plus I already reviewed the first season of his sitcom The Neighbors which reminds me “when is the second season gonna finally come out?” but getting back to it, this movie is indeed top of my list and I read the novel itself (even hear the audiobook which is also worth checking out) so you can see that I wanna watch the movie and while it is condensed, it is an enjoyable adaptation that James Franco has brought us and probably the best movie he has done so far which if you look at his previous directed works, you can see what I mean (and I have seen two movies to know that) plus he pulled it off as Tommy himself. This is the kind of tour de force that I laugh at all the way through and it is worth checking out even if you never read the novel or seen The Room.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi – This is quite possibly the most unexpected sequel in this new trilogy and that is saying much. It has caused a major divide to the fanbase old and new with Rian Johnson giving his direction in a surprise deconstructed-like way and shows how he can handle the torch-passing touch with this being more about Finn, Poe and Rey instead of Luke, Han and Leia. Some say it may be better than The Empire Strikes Back but I just see it as its own movie and others say it’s the worst movie in the franchise… Really? I don’t know but we are living in an age where any franchise takes a beating in most unexpected ways. I like this movie and I give Rian an applause for what he has done with this.

Justice League – Um, yeah? Speaking of “franchise takes a beating” and that it causes a major divide to the fanbase, here’s a movie I’ll be reviewing in months time. I won’t talk much about it yet but while I do notice the differences between Snyder and Whedon in terms of shooting scenes and James Cavill’s freaky CGI lips, it is at least a good consistent movie that unites the heroes in their effort against evil. Again, I won’t talk much about it but there’s good and bad points I will get to so I can’t wait to review this.

Thor: Ragnarok –  Ever wanted to see Thor having a Flash Gordon-like adventure with Loki and Hulk? Well, this movie is for you. It diverges not only from the comic storyline of the same name but from the two previous Thor movies meaning this is Hemsworth, Middleston and Ruffalo not giving a fuck about how the movie went and decide to go with it. This movie is colorful, humorous and a total tone change from the source material so if you’re thinking “no, not another Thor movie with Kat Dennings ruining the mood?”, don’t worry because she’s not in it.

Split – I never thought to put a M. Night Shyamalan movie on the list but here it is apparently and it’s James McAvoy giving his all playing a guy with multiple personalities that seems not in human nature. Well it is by Shyamalan so what do you expect? It also sets good creepy tone and few surprises including a bit shoehorned moment near the end with a connection to Shyamalan’s previous movie but as much as it is shoehorned, McAvoy will return to this role(s) in the next movie and it’s a good effort from Blumhouse which is a company I generally avoid before this.

Television Series

Twin Peaks – Oh, how this is a revival series that is indeed worth the wait? David Lynch has returned to the town that gave us good coffee, cherry pie and lines like “wrapped in plastic” but took it to eleven with new additions in the cast like Robert Forster and Amanda Seyfried, unexpected turning events and the eighth episode that is the most Lynchian thing David has ever done. Also, I can see David literally trolling the audience with these episodes even if he gives a ambiguous feel. The thing about this is why did it fall to few lists of worst shows last year? I find that odd but I think the opposite and it’s a journey worth taking and getting lost into. Oh, and got A light?

Mr Robot – This is a show I didn’t give much credit in here mainly because the first season is good but almost seems like a Fight Club clone and the second tries to distant from that, the third however is epic with the second stage being revealed and cause a tension whether it’s Elliott, Darlene, Angela and Mr Robot himself with twists and turns that keeps the stories rolling. Not only that but Bobby Cannavale surprisingly steals the show as Irving and I hope to see more of him the next season of this hacking thriller.

The Punisher – Probably the only Marvel show that did the character more justice than his previous incarnations played by Dolph Lundgren and Thomas Jane, this is the show that shows why The Punisher should be like this and with an interesting supporting cast and engaging storylines. Jon Bernthal became sold as the character even though I thought he wasn’t given that I’ve seen him previous in The Walking Dead and his backstory is more contemporary and worth it in a world that is about to have its Infinity War which something tells me that he and the cast of other Marvel Netflix shows might not participate in. I don’t know, I think of those as its own thing.

Happy! – I nearly forgot to put this one on the list mainly because this show came out last month and well, you can expand a Grant Morrison-written mini-series into a mindfuck of a show with Christopher Meloni not giving a fuck if he plays a hated detective being partnered up with an imaginary flying unicorn voiced by Patton Oswalt. It shows dark comedy, chaotic action and strange moments (like a out-of-nowhere cameo from Jerry Springer of all people) that only Brian Taylor of Crank fame can deliver and it shows that it’s not made as a cash-in to the success of other television series based on comics like Preacher so Detective Stabler, go act crazy on us.

Stranger Things – A show that I used I put in 2016 list but didn’t. Uh, no worries. I’m catching up to it and with the second season that proves to up the ante with new additions to the cast like Sean Astin and Paul Reiser, twists and turns like Steve Harrington becoming the hero of the piece and more nostalgic feeling with Ghostbusters and Duran Duran. It also capture the same essence that a sequel can be as good as the first especially when it involves the eighties. I only hope this season is not the show at its peak and the next being good as well so fingers crossed on this one.

American Gods – Oh, how am I gonna be sad about this show with the second season not having Bryan Fuller and Michael Green as showrunners. I generally like his take on Neil Gaiman’s novel that is expanded in greater detail. While Ian McShane deserves the praise as the mysterious Mr Wednesday, the show did have stealing moments from Gillian Anderson and Crispin Glover along with few other stars in between. It’s even a show so good that Dane Cook even has moments. I didn’t expect to write something like that. I don’t know if this show will sustain the same power with Fuller and Green being kind of involved but if not, it is good while it lasted I guess.

 Singles

“Humble” by Kendrick Lamar – Kendrick kind of has a habit of making music that came out of nowhere and it’s a good thing since when he hits the mainstream with Swimming Pools (Drank), we expect something different. A few albums and singles later, he gave us DAMN. which proves there is still good to hip-hop genre that doesn’t involve selling out and dumbing down like Snoop Dogg, Eminem and Busta Rhymes went to and this song is definition of it. There’s not much else to say but well, damn indeed.

“The Sky Is A Neighborhood” by Foo Fighters – How many times have I put Foo Fighters on the list? I don’t know but I’m not gonna check. Moving on and while Run is them coming back and show they are not “daddy rock” band they are accused out to be, this song however shows the band’s evolution in these troubling times. With the video of them in the rooftop playing with their Village of the Damned-esque eyes and the hook that’s surprisingly different, this song has its place in alternative rock that Imagine Dragons will never have (yeah, I don’t know why Imagine Dragons suck now and more than ever).

Albums

Heavy Black Heart by death’s dynamic shroud – This feels like I’m repeating what I like in 2016 to what I like in 2017 as well as dds (formerly dds.wmv) felt like that sign. However, this album has James Webster, Tech Honors and Keith Rankin working together for the first time and bring a legitimate follow-up to I’ll Try Living Like This by adding vaporwave touches with glitches and samples involved including one from Lana Del Rey that caught my ear the first second her voice appears. If there release another one this coming year, I don’t know if I’ll play it on Best of 2018 list but anything is possible.

Add Violence by Nine Inch Nails – Continuing the trilogy that started with Not The Actual Events and how it continues is a soundscape of unexpectecy with Less Than giving a future synth feel that I think I only heard once in a Starfuckers, Inc. remix to The Background World that ended on broken record note with audio compression that has nightmare fuel recorded over it. Again, it felt like a repeat to 2017 and the trilogy is due to complete within this year so Trent Reznor has yet to run out of ideas.

Comics

Dark Knights: Metal – I thought this is gonna be a weak DC crossover in a similar way they did with Convergence which the story is basically Batman and Justice League fought an evil team of alternate Batmans from the dark multiverse but I thought wrong. It felt more like I read an actual crossover that harkens back to the 1990s but done properly with one-shots explaining how this Batman became his own enemy in The Batman Who Laughs or how Bruce Wayne can handle as Green Lantern even right after his parent’s death and it shows differences and a bit of multiversal technobabble. The event is yet to finish up but for now DC has proven me wrong on this which reminds me of the next one.

Doomsday Clock – Back when DC decides to throw a prequel that is Before Watchmen, fans became outraged about touching something that should not be touched and I was honestly one of them. Now, they decide to do it again but continuing from the mystery started with DC Universe: Rebirth with a set of Watchmen characters old and new encountering the heroes of main DCU. I hope Geoff Johns knows what he is doing and I like him since he does bring something up his sleeves in the past that I didn’t expect like the DNA reveal of Superboy in Teen Titans as one example. So Watchmen invades the DCU? I wonder how that’s gonna go.

Star Trek: The Next Generation – Mirror Broken – If there’s one thing I didn’t list this year, it’s Star Trek: Discovery and part of the reason is because I am still in question on whether this show is a good idea or not. The second half of the first season is due to come out soon so while I keep an open mind, I should bring up that Mirror Broken is an idea that should not really exists since it takes place shortly before the Mirror Universe events in Deep Space Nine so how is there Imperial Starship led by Picard with twisted versions of his crew? I don’t know but it got me entertained that I want more of this.

That’s my list and I hope I didn’t forget something. Now we’re on to the rocky start of this new year, I guess it’s a usual case of me looking at Jeff Fahey movies next so other than that, let’s hope we have a year where I’m finally done with some looking back to my past reviews, more on Bibleman and maybe more antics from Tommy Wiseau. Oh, and something a movie that involves Sharks that isn’t called Sharknado.

Worst Of 2017

January 1, 2018 § Leave a comment

It’s that time of year again where I’ll give my usual opinions on what I like and what I either hate or dislike and outside of Politics, Tragedies and Multiple Celebrity Scandals, 2017 is not really a bad year. Not a good year as well but hey, I thought this year is gonna really suck big time so I didn’t somewhat expect the opposite.

Movies

Bright – Oh god, why did I watch this? While I’m gladfully didn’t see the horrors that is The Emoji Movie and The Mummy, I did took my time watching this and this movie is incredibly boring. I feel no emotions watching this other than thinking about something else and I wish I watch a different movie where Will Smith partners up with somebody that’s nothing like Will Smith to defeat those that doesn’t respect any form of law and well, there’s already basically seven movies with that plot. And the social commentary didn’t really work that even Chance the Rapper could see it on twitter. I don’t think that’s much explaining except that it may not be as more boring as After Earth but it is within that path.

Sandy Wexler – Is it surprising that I have seen this movie and almost forget about it afterwards. This is just another Adam Sandler movie with the same humorous tropes, celebrity cameos and whatever. It’s also a period piece which Adam may have done before in The Wedding Singer but here, it hardly screams 1990s unless you see a Timecop movie billboard or Weird Al Yankovic making a cameo looking himself back in that time so honestly, had this movie set in early 2000s or early 2010s, only a very little has changed. I don’t know, it’s another year where Adam dropped a bad movie but this time, it’s a bad movie that is as forgettable as the name of his previous album.

Television Series

Iron Fist – What started with the greatest that is Daredevil and Jessica Jones has ended with the problems with not just this show but also The Defenders in terms of Marvel Cinematic Universe television series. While The Defenders did at least did something that made me binge-watch it all the way through, I took my time watching this from start to finish but in weeks of getting to the finale rather than days. Finn Jones at least tried his best but with sloppy scriptwriting, bad fighting scenes and little originality, he didn’t do good enough. But the blame of this goes more to Scott Buck who’s not a very good showrunner and it’s not just this show and Inhumans (which to anybody’s surprise that I haven’t watched) but he’s the guy who’s involved in the less-favorite kind of seasons of Dexter especially the final season so Dexter Morgan as a lumberjack, you gonna thanks Scott Buck for that.

Singles

“Shape Of You” By Ed Sheeran – It is about time that I’m mentioning the global superstar that is Ed Sheeran because despite me hearing about him for several years, I am surprised that I didn’t mention him until this year. Yeah, I’m not a fan of this guy and don’t get why he is popular enough to collaborate with Eminem of all people but beyond that, I hated Shape Of You for a good reason. It’s a song that’s heard literally everywhere, it can’t escape my 33-year old head for a while. The video itself is not making it any better with Ed trying to be a champion to his girl only to end the video with him being defeated in the most ridiculous way possible. I hate this song, this video, this hook and this whatever. And it is sad that the only time I defend Ed is due to his criticized cameo in Game of Thrones, a show I don’t really watch but really… people are bitching about his role in the show? Weird.

“Something Just Like This” by The Chainsmokers & Coldplay – Just what 2017 needed, a collaboration between the guys who gave us “Selfie” and the guys who gave U2 a run for the most band to really break-up. This team-up is pathetic to the point that Chris Martin namedrops Superman more awkward than Charlie Puth and with a lyric video that made me change the channel a split second. Who was really asking for this really and what’s next? Nickelback teaming up with David Guetta? Yeah, I wish The Chainsmokers won’t come back in 2018. Coldplay on the other hand, yeah, they are inescapable so my wish for them to go away is meaningless.

“Look What You Made Me Do” by Taylor Swift – Won’t talk much about this but I do have one thing to say – this song is so bad that it damaged Right Said Fred’s discography all because of a interpolated sample… and I don’t really know why I am saying that but Taylor Swift, did Kanye West hurt you enough to become a more-egotistical pop star? Uh, moving on.

Albums

Everything Now by Arcade Fire – I really do wish this is not on the list but this album is really bad. There is few good tracks admittedly but the album is a bad move for the band by satirizing them selling out to the point where fans and non-fans are missing the satirical subtleties. What happened to you guys? You gave us the gloomy masterpieces that is Funeral and The Suburbs and now you decide to do pop songs? Why? Again, it has few good tracks like Put Your Money On Me but it’s a badly constructed album with a message that should have worked in paper but didn’t and the worst part is the band can’t handle criticism much so again, why?

Comics

Secret Empire – This one is gonna be interesting to explain. Now, the way I placed this mini-series on this list is not due to the fact that it has “Cap is Hydra” controversy that makes some fans think Marvel supports Neo-Nazis and Alt-Right, no because I knew that Nick Spencer might be planning to cop this out and became open-minded to see how this series goes. The reason I put on the list is really how this series goes since it’s surprisingly worst than Civil War with its real world gritiness that Nick slammed on Twitter and its sloppy writing skills. I can’t lie when I say that I hate comic events that feels very close to home and comic book is supposed to be part of the medium that separates fiction from reality. Also, again with the cosmic cube? Age of Ultron did it better.

So yeah, this list is not much since I haven’t seen much bad movies or shows or hear bad music but mainly because again, 2017 is not much a bad year. Say what you will but hey, there’s more good stuff I can list within this week even with stuff that I didn’t expect to list it there.

Single Santa Seeks Mrs Claus

December 24, 2017 § Leave a comment

This is gonna be an interesting way to review a Christmas movie and I hope to not be any offense in why I’m saying it here. Now it is definite that Christmas is not the only festive holiday to occur in December since there’s other holidays made in case of religious and non-religious reasons. Whether it’s Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus or Life Day, we are all individuals celebrate our own holiday that we’re born and raised in and one individual is none other than Steve Guttenberg, an actor and comedian who is raised Jewish. Now I only know him in movies and television instead of knowing him personally so whether he celebrates Christmas or Hanukkah is his right and that even includes the notion that he’s playing the son of Santa Claus in not one but two movies.

One of which I’m reviewing this year which is Single Santa Seeks Mrs Claus brought to you by Harvey Frost who kind of have the most Christmas-y name I ever head and not only he direct this and the sequel but he also directed other Christmas fares like A Grandpa For Christmas, All I Want For Christmas, Let It Snow and Battle of the Bulbs so hey, it looks like I got enough Christmas material in the next few years. He has also directed other movies which notably include The Sex And Violence Family Hour starring Jim Carrey and Golf Punks starring Tom Arnold. I don’t know if the last one is notable given that Tom is anything but worth mentioning anyway but I digress.

Steve plays Nick who is about to face his challenge which if you haven’t guess by the title is him finding the love of his life. He does this because his father Santa (John Wheeler) wants to retire and give his business to his son and Santa’s assistant Ernest (Armin Shimerman) gave Nick a list of candidates which all are located in California, none of which is single mother and businesswoman Beth (Crystal Bernard) who is overworked to the point of finding an actor playing Santa in commercials and missing much of her time with her son Jake (Dominic Scott Kay). Also, Beth stopped believing in Christmas at her young age since her wanting her father to come back is never fulfilled so that’s a reason why she’s not a chosen candidate.

With Nick meeting all of his candidates, he noticed Beth during the filming of a commercial and decide to help a child actor out with her performance, a help that lands him to act in commercials which he does before he leaves on Christmas Eve. He and Beth first hit it off as friends before Nick falls for her and tries to convince her to believe in Christmas. Whether it’s putting up Christmas lights or Jedi mind-controlled a Mall Santa to do sign language, her belief is not yet found until he spills the beans about his origins. Beth kicks him out but after thinking about what he said, she writes a letter to Santa to wish for Nick to come back and well, the movie ends with that wish coming true.

It is a fairly decent movie and best watched for all ages but there is some parts that I have to discuss. One is that at times this movie felt like it has a bit of Stranger Danger undertones with the way Nick is behaving. When he first met Beth, he helped a child actor out and then he either hangs with Jake more than Beth or hangs with other kids whether it’s by reading at library or attending a basketball game. In addition, he doesn’t reveal his last name to everybody including his information so had somebody took the Christmas message out, it almost felt like I’m watching a movie where Steve Guttenberg plays an escaped child predator.

But it is a Christmas movie and there are Christmas messages so at least writer Pamela Wallace knows what she’s doing. After all, she’s also the writer of um, 1985’s Witness starring Harrison Ford! Well, how she went from a memorable movie to this is beyond me. The movie really has some hammy dialogue, few product placements and cheesy moments but it’s not all bad really so it’s at least watchable despite what I said. So anyway, if you want a Christmas movie starring Steve Guttenberg, this is one of them so do check it out. So Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays this season.

Asylum Seeker: Thunderstorm: The Return Of Thor

November 30, 2017 § Leave a comment

Oh boy. Well, given that Thor: Ragnarok came out this month, I thought I am glad that I’m reviewing this because it’s the last Superhero movie made by TomCat Films (or Summer Hill Entertainment since they now acquired those movies) but I’m not glad because it turns out I’m a dumbass by forgetting that there’s also one more movie I didn’t check which is The Black Knight Returns. Uh, what can I say? I might be confusing it with The Black Bat Rises but it’s two different movies so yeah, I am stuck with TomCat Superhero Cinematic Universe for one more movie.

I’ll get to that one sometime next year but for now, let me look at what is possibly the most schlocky, low-budget superhero movie I’ve seen to date. And really, that’s expected since I already seen the other movies but as much as The Amazing Bulk is a work of weird as fuck and few others have their own sense of quality, this one is cheap from start to finish and it’s laughably bad. To obviously know how bad this movie is, it starts with five minutes of opening logos and the slowest opening crawl with a narration that sounds like it’s recorded in the bathroom.

Following the opening crawl that makes the one in Alone In The Dark start normal, the movie then cuts to Asgard looks like it’s located in Aurora Borealis?!? Anyway, Odin (Jurgen Vollrath) and Thor (Brett Kelly) appears as floating heads talking to each other even though they look like they are talking to us the audience. They explained that Ragnarok is coming and it’s caused by a group known Dauoi Raisa/The Death Risers as led by Evan (Jody Haucke) who’s tracking down three amulets to make up that Dragon’s Cross that brings Hel (Gabrielle Mackenzie) to Earth and be less over-the-top than her counterpart in the better Thor movie.

Meanwhile, Grant Farrel (Ray Besharah) and his friend Earl (Randy Kimmett) are working on a government suit that looks a bit like dollar-store version of War Machine suit with horns. Grant himself got struck by lightning by Thor because he is a current descendant of the God of Thunder and decides to take the mantle as the hero. The new Thor (or Thunderstorm which the movie should have been called Thunderstorm: The Offspring Of Thor or something) is trained by Earl with controlling his powers and got noticed by Detective Glenda Bronski (Celine Filion) who she and Grant became a “buddy cop” type duo defeating Hel, The Death Risers and a CGI Dragon that looks like James Nguyen is secretly involved in this.

In terms of superhero origin stories, it’s okay but felt like I’m watching a loose origin of Firestorm at one point and loose origin of Iron Man on the other. Granted, it’s a Thor movie and there is Norse mythology involved. The acting is atrocious but is fine as Hel right down to probably the only character wearing a probable outfit. The action scenes and effects is meh and lastly, the humor felt forced with Grant trying out his own superhero catchphrase but it didn’t work.

My say to this is if you wanna see an obscure bad superhero movie, this is up there but if you expect so-bad-its-good, expect elsewhere so now I am on to one more Superhero movie and then I would say I am done with TomCat Films but there’s a bunch I want to look at so yeah, no escaping that one.