Just A Harmless Attack #3: Dance Movies

November 14, 2010 § Leave a comment

Aah, Dance Movies. From the time when Vince Barbarino does his moves on disco to the second when the Swayze unleashes his moves, It was the best of times and the worst of times. However, The Worst has somehow went over the limit quite recently when you can listen to soundtrack that are autotuned to uh… Chris Brown giving his acting chops. I might say that the golden age of Dance Movie genre is long gone and Dance Dance Revolution is sadly not just an arcade game anymore.


So before I start this installment to “Just A Harmless Attack”, I should remind you that I’m only checking some of the movies involving this genre that’s released last decade as well this year and since those ones involves multicultural cast with their dance moves, I’m all for that. Because to be honest, I’m a bit old-fashioned since the last good movie released with the genre will have to be Honey and I just miss the days when those movies have some originality and anything else so just in case, You reading an article done by the person who preferred any movies released before the first one I’m gonna start of with…

Just Got Served – Long ago, I happen to see the movie and lost interest at how it involves. In fact, This make me not watch any Dance Movie after this and it’s because of the genre going downhill since this release. It’s about a group of dancers who wants their chance of freedom but with angst involved (with one of the characters getting shot) like several other movies. The movie might be minor box office success but it failed enough that it gained Omarion a couple of chart-topping hits and well this…


I never got the chance to see that spinoff and will I check it out? Dude, Have you looked at the cover? It’s like as if Kevin Federline shows us how to be better than Vanilla Ice, It could be that bad. On the plus side, I do like how South Park portrayed the movie in a comedic way with Lil’ Kim and everything.

Stomp The Yard – Okay, This one is a weird entry. It’s about dancers in the African-American University which I can take but with Ne-Yo and Chris Brown acting… Sure, I can deal with Ne-Yo acting but Chris Brown is a different story since we all know about the whole Rihanna controversy. Plus, It involves this dance craze known as Krump and it’s more of “Just Got Served for the College Set”. There is couple good parts like Chris Brown’s character getting killed off and the fact that the Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity & Sorority boycotted this movie. And the sad thing about that is The Alpha Phi Alpha later honored the filmmakers in the Frat’s 103rd Anniversary Convention. At least I’m glad that there’s no sequel coming out.


Make It Happen – Now let’s see this movie here… It has Mary Elizabeth Winstead in it. Sweet, I like her in few movies. Anything else, It’s exactly like Honey meaning no Serving or Krumping is involved. I guess I can see it. Now for the critical response, I can’t believe at what I’m checking. These reviews are harsh and it’s mentioned to have similarities with Save The Last Dance (which I like) and Flashdance (which is a bit overrated but anyway) plus it doesn’t show enough skin (and I don’t know what to think about that). Oh, And it’s mentioned that the Dance Moves are lazy and is nothing groundbreaking. Well, I seen the trailer and it looks okay. So if this is the worst movie to have Ramona Flowers herself, I don’t know what to do (but she did also star in Death Proof).

Step Up – And now for the main course, This movie and its sequels. I never seen it and prefer it to be easily forgotten. But like Twilight, It’s still fucking here. Why? I heard Step Up 2 is negatively criticized and then they made a second sequel which is in 3D. What is the point? It probably has the same clichés as other Dance Movies and the hope is that the movie ends with two main couples winning their passion or something. I may not be a serious clubber but after seeing the trailers for Step Up 3D not long ago, I prefer to go to some Gothic Club or Dungeons And Dragons Night. As for the soundtrack, It is sad that I think I heard the songs of Step Up 2 soundtrack and I think I should just stick to Dr Dre, 2Pac and Eminem’s early Pre-Encore material. So Step Up, You maybe a Box Office success but you also suck anyway.

So I’m done my part and stand by my comments. I could see “Make It Happen” but if there’s a chance I could review any of these other awful movies, It’s gonna be a little while longer. It’s mainly because I have a lot of stuff but then I’m scared shitless to see the Step Up franchise like I chickened out of Twilight just after seeing the first movie. And since those movies above have urban lifestyle and all, I’m not being a racist bastard like Michael fucking Richards (I’ve stopped watching Seinfeld reruns following that act) and already mentioned that I’m just a bit old-fashioned when it comes to these movies and music. So if you excuse me, I’m gonna drink to forget the first time I’ve seen You Got Served even though I’m doing that for years.

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