The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

November 30, 2011 § Leave a comment

You know what sucks? I was gonna review 666: The Beast and see if it’s better or worse than the original which is a ball of laughs. But Instead, I’m reviewing another Twilight movie. Why? Because Breaking Dawn Part 1 just came out this month and it might be a good time to take on Eclipse. Oh, Why Not? It’s not like it’s gonna be great anyway.

But before I get to the movie, I should explain one thing about David Slade. When I mentioned him in my old article involving Twilight, I might be wrong on how he decided to make the movie for just cash or him being replaced by a doppelgänger (which I find that idea funny) so how did he possibly get involved in this movie? It’s because of Muse because he used to direct music videos by one of the favorite british rockers in my lifetime… Well, Maybe he still do it for money. And No, I’m not adding another image of Muse so here’s something different.

Okay, The movie begins somewhat differently as we’re introduced to Riley Biers (Xavier Samuel) who is bitten by a mysterious vampire. Well, It’s a good start for another bad movie but we then get to Edward and Bella doing the usual like going to school, talk to her father Charlie about going on a trip with Edward to see her mother and The Cullens hunting down Victoria… who is now played by Bryce Dallas Howard!!!

So after that, Edward and Bella returned to Forks High and Jacob appears at their school. Bella decides to go with Jacob to their place and nothing much except that the werewolf pack now has a female character. Okay, Wait A Minute… This movie was criticized by Non-Twilight fans as having Jacob’s wolf pack to act a bit homoerotic and we now have a female werewolf known as Leah (Julia Jones). Maybe she’s just a movie-only character and doesn’t exist on the source material.

Nothing happens much still but we return to Riley as he’s now in Bella’s house which he checks around before he has gone away when she gets back home. And Then, Edward gets there and danger is afoot so they planned anything like forming an alliance with the wolf pack and giving us the first flashback sequence which involves the battle between vampires and werewolves centuries earlier.

Meanwhile, Riley and his newborn vampires are wrecking havoc while gaining a new member Bree (Jodelle Ferland) and there are pointless moments including Edward and Bella in bed doing nothing, The Cullens watching television and Jacob kissing Bella which results to the punch which results to Bella punching Jacob that actually got her hurt like his face is a brick wall.

After that punch, Edward and Bella went back to the Cullens House and we got another dream sequence which this time is about Rosalie (Nikki Reed) in 1920s Prohibition Era. It’s explained that she got raped by her drunk fiancée before she became a vampire later on. Yeah, We don’t see much of that because of its suitable audience but we already have True Blood so let’s move on. We then return to Riley’s chaotic moments as he and his friends are being watched by the Volturi before we cut to high school graduation and the aftermath party. Alice gets a vision and finds that the newbloods are heading to Forks.

The alliance had started their training before we cut to yet another flashback sequence and this time it involves Jasper being sired by three female vampires and the aftermath of that. We then got to stuff like Jacob carrying Bella to Riley and Victoria talking about plans to kill Bella and Bella having a conversation with Charlie about sex to Edward and Bella’s attempt to get it on that didn’t work which now leads to what I think is the most awkward moment in the Twilight Saga…

Yeah, I’m moving on from that. On the next morning, Jacob decides to leave before Bella convinces him to stay by kissing him… and near Edward of course. And then, I’m about to see something else unexpected. I’ve already seen how Riley becomes a werewolf, those three nice flashback sequences, Bella punching Jacob and… That scene which is worthy of multiple slash fanfics. So after all that, We get to the battle between the Cullens, the Wolf Pack and the newblood and… I gonna give to David Slade but he made the battle looked cool so bravo.

We get a couple of deaths including Edward beheading Victoria before the Volturi arrived and decide to make the off-screen death of Bree because she’s part of the newblood who wanted to seek asylum but no chance. Then the movie ends with Edward and Bella deciding to tell her father about the engagement.

I don’t know what to think of it because it is slightly better than the last two but there is heaps of padding involved. There is some minor good moments and that’s about it. All I could say now is that I’ve got two more to look forward… Somebody Help Me!

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