Asylum Seeker: Furious Road

July 5, 2015 § Leave a comment

And now we got into TomCat Films’ side of exploiting their company by distributing rip-offs of movies that recently hit the big screen and by recently, I mean they decide to take a 2013 film, retitled it and re-release it this year because that is what Furious Road is all about. Furious Road was originally known as Enemy Empire and I don’t know, it might be a knock-off of Enemy starring Jake Gyllenhaal that came out that year instead. Other than that, it may be distributed by TomCat Films but it is produced by a company known simply as… Have another Cherry! Unusual name for a movie company but hey, it’s the same company that gave us such unknown gems as Alien Theory and The Borrower, both of which has the alternate titles of Warrior Of Roads and Beyond Bio-Dome.

MPW-64852
Okay, I made the alternate titles up but this movie along with the other two I just brought up is made by Michael Ryan Hahn who started his career as assistant to director for 2006’s I-See-You.com which is possibly the only he is involved that has a sense of well-known celebrities like Beau Bridges and Rosanna Arquette (well, related to well-known celebrities but anyway). Other than that, not much information to add really other than he made two other short films so uh, I don’t know… this is the kind of work I’m doing so can we get on with the movie.

ISeeYou.com
Taking place in a future (duh!) where America has been into a desert wasteland for some reason and there’s a disease known as The Sun Disease that rendered humans to wear goggles, we meet with Sol (Tristan James Butler) who escapes from prison and is on the run with two guards. Sol killed them while one of the guards chained him to the Torture Machine which is perfect for having Gaear from Fargo shuffling Carl in there. As he is near death, a wanderer appeared by the name of Cleo (Elisabeth Meurer) who picks up a wireless phone but has no answer because Sol used it earlier.

Phone
Sol and Cleo decide to work together with Sol looking for Catherine and her captor known as the Nomad King while Cleo is looking for ways to get into Paradise City maybe to see if Axl Rose survived or something else and this where the movie begins to get strange. They encountered the Nomad King’s cousin who only goes by The Duke of Lear (Justus Zimmerman) and Sol decides to sword fight with The Duke before killing him. And then they continued their endless journey in a long montage. Along the way, they are secretly followed by Misty (Elisabeth Meurer again) who’s a teenage archer who claims to look for her parents (but really is trying to live her life shooting bows and arrows like she’s Katniss).

The Duke
They got into a trap of sorts which has Cleo takes off her goggles and finally see the daylight outdoors with her eyes bleeding out. She’s fine of course before Sol discovers Misty and punched her while thinking the punch killed her (she lives of course) before they resume their journey. We then meet Giric (Ralph Riddle) who’s killing somebody randomly before we get back at them traveling and encountering a Prisoner (Morgan Roberts) who helped them with their adventure by bringing in the head of The Oracle. So it leads to them meeting The Oracle (Joanne Baron) in a boat with some guy and a fake fish. If you think it’s weird, this is nothing to them having the most batshit and awkward conversation I have ever heard. I just can’t described what they are talking about.

Oracle

So they got The Oracle’s head (by The Oracle’s permission?) and went back to the prisoner. It didn’t work and Cleo punched Sol which leaves him walking alone at night. And then Sol got captured by Henry (Harry Smith) who is looking for his daughter. Sol claimed that he killed her which leads to Giric fighting against Cleo. But don’t worry, Cleo survived with Giric being attacked by arrows from Misty while surprisingly live. Yeah, a random murderer survives the battle only to find other victims. Cleo and Misty are then separated before Cleo finds Henry putting Sol in the hole. Henry decides to find his daughter while giving a go ahead for Cleo to rescue Sol. And then they continued their journey as always.

Walking
They resting and making love at night. Hours later, they got captured by two random guys in mask with one trying to work up the phone (which looks like a walkie-talkie). The masked duo talked about stuff like it’s normal before they got killed by a Witch Hunter (Alexander Aguila) who uh also hold them captive in the same place. He then decides to let Sol go before they fought each other and have Sol’s magnetic arm being trapped by a big magnet and then… Sol is somehow transported to the beach in a split second!

The Beach

Sol then meets a Surgeon (Bryan Bellomo) who explained that Sol is subjected as an experiment to kill any woman by the name of Catherine while having his memories wiped multiple times. The Oracle then suddenly appears looking like she’s back from the dead and Sol goes on a bit of rampage by throwing the Surgeon’s mind-wiping equipment to the ocean. The Oracle then helps Sol go back to Cleo who is still captured by that Witch Warrior. When The Oracle disappears (oh, so she’s a ghost?!?), Sol saves Cleo while fought against Witch Warrior in another place that includes that Torture Machine.

Witch Warrior
Witch Warrior got defeated by being stuck to the machine but before he died, a gas has set off leaving the three to sleep with the Surgeon appearing to carry Sol and reprogrammed him. Sol is mindwiped again and goes on killing a random person before Cleo finds him and tries to make him remember. Sol nearly killed Cleo but with a little flower left in her clothing, he remembers and they are reunited with love. Oh, and The Surgeon… he got killed by Misty on the beach just because it’s a thing that happened in the movie.

The Surgeon
Well, this is one weird and boring movie so where to honestly start? This movie is really about two people traveling around the desert for several hours and encountering strange civilians along the way and nothing else. It’s basically how Michael watches Gus Van Sant’s Gerry and think “I’m gonna make the same movie but on shrooms”. And the weirdness of it, I can’t deny that it’s unique and unexpected because this is close enough to see what an post-apocalyptic movie would be like if it’s directed by Tim Burton.

Sol Misty
Other than few actors acting quirky and awkward, the main two are just boring and not worth it. Sol is not the perfect Max wannabe and Cleo goes from being a fighter to a damsel in distress. And the big bad is just a random scientist in a lab coat who wants Sol to kill and nothing else. The Witch Warrior, Gaeic, The Duke of Lear, they are just there to be either alive, dead or disappeared. And wow, the title itself is so inaccurate since not only it’s just a post-apocalyptic desert movie that has no roads at all but no vehicles as well… well if you count the boat and this.

Trolley
The same can be said for being calling the movie Enemy Empire as well since well, where’s the empire of it all? Is the empire an “empire of dirt” like how Trent Reznor mentioned it in one of his songs because if so, you should have called it that. I just simply recommend this movie since it’s not a good knockoff and not a great avant-garde post-apocalyptic piece either. Actually, there is one person I could recommend to and it’s Aaron Clarey of Return of Kings website because he’s such a MRA crybaby that he wants a movie that doesn’t have a feminist message and is a piece of American culture (which is what he called Mad Max franchise even though it’s Australian). Yeah, it’s better to check out Fury Road instead (and I guess Road Wars as well since it doesn’t really suck). I was thinking of going back to The Neighbors now and I will within this coming week but this movie… this movie screws my mood a little so uh… I got a good idea on how to fix that so don’t worry, I’ll get to the new episode of that sitcom shortly.

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