Worst Of 2015

January 4, 2016 § Leave a comment

And it comes to this part of this year’s retrospective. I can’t deny that this year is not great but at the same time, it is better than last year at least so let’s just get on with it because I got a bunch of Fahey movies to watch and review.

Movies

Accidental Love – Now in honesty, I don’t want to go further details on why I don’t like this movie mainly because I wrote a half-finished review for it and that review will have to wait a month or two but suffice to say, it is on the list and I do have my reasons so best to prepare for it. This article has started so easy but oh boy, it is just a start.

Fantastic Four – Okay, I have seen bad comic book movies before this since I’m into comics since I was a kid. Not only do I own DVD copies of Howard The Duck and Batman and Robin but I also own a VHS copy of Generation X and I really shouldn’t since that movie is so bad that I can see how Matt Frewer tries to be second-rate Jim Carrey wannabe in that time period. But those movies have stories, moments and stills to your mind from start to finish. Fantastic Four is really, really, really the worst comic book movie I have literally seen and I say fuck Fox for rebooting it as a depressed, Nolaneseque wannabe piece of shit. You guys manage to kill Josh Trank’s career after that tweet and you have lost your chance to tie this to X-Men movie franchise so uh, just read my review of this because I want to move on from this piece of turd that might possible be the starting point for the current superhero movie implosion.

Sharknado III: Oh Hell No – Yeah, I’m putting this one in here and I recently watched an extended Sharktacular edition of the movie with a couple of new endings. This movie is so far the lesser great sequel in the franchise and I am gonna check out the fourth movie to see if I’m wrong but you know what? Fuck calling it Sequelitis because this movie franchise is suffering from… *sigh* Sharkelitis? Sharknadolitis? Eh whatever, it’s just another dumb monster spoof with more dumb washed-up celebrities getting killed off for no reason so yeah, bring on the fourth movie I guess.

Ted 2 – It’s the second year in a row where I have to put a Seth McFarlane movie in this list and honestly, this movie is not as bad as A Million Ways To Die In The West but it is entirely forgettable. I do however give one funny part in the movie and it’s Patrick Warburton reprising his role from the first movie… while dressing like The Tick and that got me giggled since I have seen him played The Tick once so it may be a dumb fanservice gag but I liked that gag. Other than that, this movie is just whatever.

The Ridiculous Six – This is another movie best saved to talk about as a movie review and I only saw this movie just last week and didn’t like it. It is not as bad as That’s My Boy but it is another crappy western comedy that tries to be the next Blazing Saddles. And oh boy, there’s few insane parts in this movie that I am shocked to see but again, best to save it for another time and you get my point.

Television Series

The Last Man On Earth – Now this one is kinda a controversial part here since there is audience that likes this show and I have seen the whole first season (but not yet the second which I didn’t know it was out until now). This show is just not good to me and I try to like it more but I don’t know why I didn’t. It is just a show about a dumb average joe who thought he is the last male on earth but more people show up and he becomes angry and annoyed about it to the point where he ruined whatever he does and comes his way. Oh yeah, and the title of the show lies to us… at least until maybe the last episode ever if it ever aired in the future so yeah, I didn’t like this show much but it was watchable.

The Neighbors – It is a good thing I have the opportunity to analyse the whole first season of the series and can’t wait for more. However, it is still one of the worst internet-based television shows I ever seen but it is getting to the so-bad-its-good territory so who knows? Maybe I’ll like the show more now when the second season will hit Hulu and I’ll be there to review the fuck out of it. At the start, I thought this show is so bad that The Room fans might not like it but overtime, I thought wrong and it kinda makes me love-hate this show so Tommy, keep doing those insane stories.

Under The Dome – I am glad this one got cancelled since this show is not as bad as the second season but it does follow it a bit. It ditches one love triangle and now throws in two love triangles that go absolutely nowhere, it gives us out-of-character moments and it is all around boring with the civilians becoming controlled slaves to Marg Helgenberger’s character. Again, I am glad this got cancelled but at least I watched nearly the whole of it. I am just waiting my time to see the last couple of episodes which already aired.

Singles

Charlie Puth featuring Meghan Trainor – Marvin Gaye – This song is bad, it really is bad. How could you make a doo-wop love song that includes the words “let’s Marvin Gaye and get it on”? Hey, you two do know that Marvin Gaye got killed by his father after his argument with his parents, right? And have you seen his personal history? It involves abuse, drugs, suicide attempts and I did brought up his death. So really, do you wanna say “let’s Marvin Gaye and get it on” in that sense? Sure, he makes love songs but that line of delivery could mean everything but love or sex.

And the music video is a stuff of WTF which has the two singing the song in a high school formal dance that immediately is about to segue to a Caligula-style orgy. And it’s not just twenty-year olds playing high school students but teachers are joining in the action. The video you did might cause a future formal dance to become a bad news story so expect teacher-student relationship, except footage to be recorded, except unwanted pregnancy. Thanks Charlie and Meghan, you are giving the wrong impression of love to this song. Oh Sex Sells, you are definitely doing it wrong.

Charlotte Devaney featuring Snoop Dogg – Flip It – Hey Snoop, what the fuck happened to you man? You once hit it big with What’s My Name and you once prove you still got cred with Drop It Like It’s Hot but after you decide to briefly change your name to Snoop Lion, you become a joke in rap music big time. And then came you and Jason Derulo with Wiggle which is the point of me to hate how today’s music is becoming. It doesn’t even help that Charlotte Devaney is bad to the point where she looks like Katy Perry’s long-lost aunt trying to cash in her niece’s success like Billy Ray did with Miley’s stuff. Uh, I hate this song.

Galantis – Peanut Butter Jelly – This song would have been okay if it didn’t make me think of a dumb Family Guy joke, if it didn’t include unnecessary horn beats and if it didn’t have a comical music video that is similar to Turn Down For What but it has those and I am not a fan of this. I don’t mind Runaway though but this one… uh, I hate songs with those already-dated horn beats and this one is a high mark so far for it so this song is ruined.

Honey Boo Boo – Movin’ Up – This song is so bad that after five to ten seconds, I stopped playing and preferred something else so long story short, this is definitely the worst song of this year and I only heard the start of it. Just… let’s just ignore this and move on to the next one.

Jack U featuring Justin Bieber – Where Are U Now? – Skrillex and Justin Bieber, together at last. Now I’m not a fan of either of those two. I hated Justin ever since he got famous and Skrillex is similar but he does have a tad bit unique kind of dubstep (or brostep which is his baby). This song however is meh but there is one part of the song that annoying and it’s not Bieber, it’s one of those instrumental loops that made me go “uh, seriously, why not throw in those horns while you’re at it?”. I don’t have anything to say about Diplo since I hardly listen to his stuff before this so can’t state my opinion on this. But beyond that, it’s a generic chart-topping hit that I can tolerate at least.

Silento – Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae) – Okay, confession, I dislike songs that’s only about a dancing fad from Achy Breaky Heart, Macarena and The Ketchup Song and this is a very bad one since it involves two dancing fads mixed into one. I mean, I can dance to songs that are set to dance but songs that are set to dance the Harlan Shake in a forceful way. I would want to talk more about this but in short, screw this song and screw this Silento fella because he should say Silent…O! I’m probably the 100th person using that pun joke and it gets even worse when it was used as Fuller House promo which is easily the worst thing ever to come out of 2015 that isn’t Martin Shkreli.

Albums

Daniel Johns – Talk – This is quite possibly the only worst album I listed this year and let me tell you this, I listened to few I thought was bad but is not really. The new Coldplay album is not good but listenable, the Jack U album is meh but so are anything else by Skrillex so he’s out of the list and I thought Drones by Muse was gonna be bad but it’s more lesser-favorite and there are good songs in there. Daniel Johns’ album on the other hand, let me tell you brief about me being a fan of Silverchair since the beginning.

Now I’m not a huge fan per se but I like how the band goes from post-grunge to alternative rock. I can even deal with Daniel teaming up with Paul Mac on The Dissociatives. But this album is him trying to get down with the crowd who listens to PR&B music like The Weeknd and Frank Ocean and in the kind of way where your father throws in outdated slangs. This album is an embarrassment of his body of work and I felt nothing while listening to the album. There’s this TV Tropes second called Dork Age and this album should be on that section. Daniel, if you wanna transcend to other genres, go ahead but do know that there are divided qualities and yeah, I don’t like your album so you’re no David Bowie on this part.

Comics

Convergence – I miss good old DC universe/multiverse stories before the whole New 52/DC You happened and this mini-series and tie-ins tried to help me like it but, it’s a very, very colossal mess and definitely rushed. On the bright side, it did give few spin-offs like Superman: Lois and Clark but there is also Telos who’s not a very interesting character and this mini-series is like a last straw for my readings on Earth-2 after the terribleness that is Earth-2: World’s End. And there’s the whole thing that it’s competing with Marvel on Secret Wars and we all may never knew who started the whole multiversal crisis event first for this year but despite Secret Wars‘ shipping issues, it at least was trying to be competent while Convergence failed to do. And this is a sad way to say this but as a longtime DC fan, I don’t think there’s any comics I want to check out from them except for non-continuity ones so Dan Didio, please quit and take Bob Harras and Scott Lobdell with you because DC Comics ain’t what it used to be anymore.

Star Wars: Shattered Empire – I was a bit hyped about this series since it shows us a link between Return of the Jedi and The Force Awakens and the fact that Greg Rucka is writing it. So far, it did show a bit of the aftermath of the second Death Star’s destruction but that’s the issue, it shows a BIT of it. Instead, it focused on characters who is not major in these two movies and have main protagonists like Luke and Han shoved as supporting cameos. This series is not worth checking out unless you’re a Greg Rucka or Star Wars completists and it is kind of lie that it shows what really happened between these two movies when what really happened is a little background event. But hey, it’s just one of the Journey to Star Wars line that consisted of other stories that sets between those two movies.

Alright, I don’t know if I miss anything but whatever, these are the stuff I hate or don’t like and if you like it, that’s your choice but I still with what I say. Alright, let’s just move on to something before I complain more about Fantastic Four or something.

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