The Ridiculous Six (Recap Part 1)

December 11, 2016 § Leave a comment

Before I start, I should point out something that I want to say personally. I started this site as a challenge back when I was (and still) a member of Channel Awesome forum back when it was called That Guy With The Glasses. I was starting out and wrote some things that’s not as polished and done proper as it was right now and heck, in several years time, I would say the same thing for what I’m doing now. I wrote reviews at the start that’s suggested by somebody else before I branch out and went from movies by The Asylum to doing a retrospective on a director that a majority don’t like. The thing is I’ve been inspired by the likes of The Agony Booth, Jabootu and others and I have been preparing to do a extended recap-style review for a long while now even if one hates it so why not look into this? It may suck but I’m doing it so let’s just go with it.

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To begin the movie, we meet up with Tommy Stockburn (Adam Sandler) who’s riding to the store with his fiancée Smoking Fox (Julia Jones) to gather flour, peanut butter and other stuff from Clem (Steve Zahn). While Tommy is getting his stuff, Fox is then noticed and harassed by The Left-Eye Gang which leads to Tommy taking action. And he fought the gang by using his super-speed and related powers which makes me wonder if Adam Sandler wants to play The Flash. Anyway, the gang got defeated before Clem comes out with his shotgun and Tommy throws a carrot at his feet before he and his girl rode back to their home.

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Living in a Native American village, Tommy enjoys his life with his family while Fox and her friends talk about how good he is (which is enough to lose the Bachdel Test) before his biological father Frank (Nick Nolte) arrives looking for his son. After he found him, Tommy is having nightmare flashbacks to how his mother got killed and it woke him. He meets up with his dad and they talked about why he’s here. Frank mentioned he’s dying and wants to offer his son $50,000 which he refuses. One of his friends in the tribe overheard it and wants to take the offer but with Tommy present, it’s still refused. On the next morning, a group of bandits as led by Cicero (Danny Trejo) arrive looking for Frank to get the cash from him.

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Frank agree to Cicero’s proposal as long as his son and friends are not harmed and they rode off to the Singing Windmill in Jawbone Fall where the money is buried. Tommy however wants to save his father so he decides to go to a nearby town and rode the money from the wealthy and filthy rich. He hitches a ride and went there as a complete stranger including a crooked bank manager played by Chris Parnell. However, He is also noticed by Esmerelda (Julia Vera) and offers him a stay. Tommy shortly tells Esmeralda about anything including Frank’s name and Esmeralda reveals to Tommy that she and Frank had a one-night stand which has her later giving birth to her son and Tommy’s half-brother Ramon (Rob Schneider).

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Tommy meets up his half-brother for the first time and explains the plan which Ramon asked if he could join in. He said no but Ramon doesn’t take no for the answer so he awkwardly hugs Tommy as well as brushing his hair. He quickly accepts but not before he sees Ramon’s goat farting shits on the wall. The two then plans to rob the bank the following morning with Ramon and his goat going in the front to annoy the banker while Tommy sneaks in and opens the safe stealing cash while discovering a message from his dad written in chalk.

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Meanwhile, Ramon and his goat’s actions were notice by Lil Pete (Taylor Lautner) and he ask him if he wanna help out. Ramon then spills the beans about the plan and Pete also mention his father is Frank. As Tommy is getting set to escape with the three, Ramon’s goat shit-farts again and towards the banker and the three half-brothers ride on to their adventure. Elsewhere, Clem wants to join the Left-Eye Gang and the gang themselves mention that to be part of the gang, you must have no right eye. Clem brought up that his left eye is noticeably badly seen anyway but he does so anyway by ripping the right eye out in front of them.

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Okay so far, the movie didn’t get on to a good start. It’s really unfunny including the donkey’s shit-fart gags and nothing much is presented. There are jokes but with native american names like Smoking Fox and Never Wears Bra (seriously, there’s a character with that name), it’s hard to not notice on why it hits controversy on the community and news media. I’m only nearly thirty-two minutes in and I’m just bored and puzzled by its existence even with Adam Sandler playing a character who’s a superhuman for no reason. One could say that it’s because he’s adopted and raised by the tribe but you’ll see that it’s not the case in later parts of the review. So yeah, it’s just the beginning and do prepare for what’s coming.

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