The Tooth Fairy 2

May 11, 2017 § Leave a comment

Well, I never expected to go down to this road but before I’ll get to talk about… this guy! Let me first bring up Alex Zamm. And who is this auteur that Hollywood is still hiring to this day? Well, he got his start on television work but it’s not until he enters the film business by writing a script to a classic that is… Chairman of the Board! Um, did I say classic? My bad. Since then, he got involved in such projects as Inspector Gadget 2, Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2 and the one that I reviewed years ago which is Dr Dolittle: Million Dollar Mutts. And this is the reason I set myself to a new low by reviewing this direct-to-DVD turkey.

But really, I can’t fault him since I’m sure he might be a father and makes movies for his children or a type of audience. I mean, it explains why Sean McNamara said yes to a bunch of Baby Geniuses sequels. However, I am gonna be grumpy with the fact that I’m reviewing a sequel to The Tooth Fairy starring Larry The Cable Guy. There are many questions on this movie like why did this warrant a sequel but despite negative reviews, the first movie is a box office hit. Also, another question is why this guy is the pick for the sequel and if somebody is gonna bring up Cars franchise, I would continue asking questions on that instead and that would a long time to rant about it.

So the movie revolves around Larry Guthrie (Larry The Cable Guy) whom won a car after a bowling miracle that involves him slipping on the floor and the bowling ball hits the whole bowling alley full of pins. Ignoring that it’s physically impossible, his winning also led to a break-up with his girlfriend Brooke (Erin Beute) who falls to mayoral candidate Bo Billings (David Mackey) but he’s not giving up even if it took nearly a whole year so he decides to help out Brooke at a child care centre while being a dick by saying The Tooth Fairy doesn’t exist to Gabe McGee (Gabriel Suttle).

And being a dick obviously caused him to become The Tooth Fairy with Nyx (Brady Reiter) as his case agent and has to do the duty or he’ll lose his favorite memory which is his bowling win. Like the first movie, he does his duties all while getting to shenanigans while winning a girl’s heart and making Gabe and other kids believing in the Tooth Fairy so the movie is almost a retelling of the predecessor except for location and character changes. I honestly don’t know what to else about the story other than the fact that it’s exactly like the first movie except it involves a blue collar comedian instead of a wrestling superstar.

Aside from the story, the movie is one of the worst sequels I’ve taken my time to watch and I don’t mean it by angering standards. I mean it by the fact that this is pointless and non-existent. To compare, the other movie Larry and Alex is involved in is Jingle All The Way 2 and it also plays out the first movie except instead of Turboman, it’s a talking bear known as Harrison Bear. Whether I should review this or that, it don’t matter because in the end, I’m reviewing a poor remake rather than a poor sequel with the same beats, inferior humor (like Larry talking to Nyx about Chicken which went too long) and weak lead.

I do apologize if this review is at best short but there is nothing to talk further about this movie because of what I said. I may not like the first movie as well but at least it did something – it proved that an actor best known for wrestling and action movie field can play a role that is so ridiculous that it felt more like a fake parody movie joke ala Adam Sandler’s movies seen within Judd Apatow’s Funny People. But if there’s anything to say, it’s the fact that it took me this long to review a movie starring Larry The Cable Guy and probably will never review another one again even if it’s a bad theme month idea.

At least the next one is a better choice for lookback review backlog but let’s just say that even though it’s been a while since I went to that one and that it is more than one story that I should tackle so had to think on how on this one.

(Star Trek) Renegades: The Requiem, Part 1

May 2, 2017 § Leave a comment

Being a fan of Star Trek franchise since my childhood, I have seen a fair share of fan productions whether it’s Phase II/New Voyages which adapts unused episodic scripts or a TNG porn parody that would work as a standalone TNG episode if you’ve taken the sex scenes out. And in 2013, production started on Star Trek: Renegades which follows the events of the final episode of Star Trek: Voyager which familiar faces like Walter Koenig, Tim Russ and Robert Ricardo along with Edward Furlong and Sean Young join in the show.

The first episode finally premiered in 2015 due to patience and crowdfunding and it is an interesting take on the franchise with the cast of characters being more rebellious than the Marquis. It had good performances, interesting storyline and alright special effects if you get used to the low-budget fan productions aspect. So since then, fans were waiting for the follow-up but something happened. Paramount decide to change guidelines for fan films and fucked with the fanbase. Granted, the first half of the second installment of the series did came out but it doesn’t have the same feel.

So Renegades (formerly Star Trek: Renegades) focused on United Federation of Planets being on its troubling times so Admiral Pavel Chekov (Walter Koenig) and Commander Tuvok (Tim Russ) set up a team full of criminals and non-federation officials as led by Lexxa Singh (Adrienne Wilkinson) to discover what is tearing the centuries-old government apart. The first mission was somewhat successful with Lexxa and her crew to get along and have started adventures unlike any other. That was the first episode in a nutshell. Yeah, I leave out why the Federation is in crisis and who is Lexxa’s team-mates are because basically the second episode have a sense of ignoring and changing it big time.

While the synopsis of the second episode focused primary of Chekov to resign from his position and join the renegade crew while explaining further on what’s happening, anything seems off. Truly, the character names are intact and their motivations but it stopped being Star Trek fan production and attempt to be its own thing with the title of this episode itself as a giveaway clue since this will be Walter Koenig’s final performance as Chekov (and presumably Nichelle Nichols as Uhura) and after his final performance, anything that says Star Trek will be diminished with the possible exception of few characters I mention as well as having Shree (Courtney Peldon) whose species is Andorian, an alien race that is part of Star Trek franchise.

Another point is that the costume changes occur for Federation officials with insignia being absent and speaking of which, even the word “Federation” is changed to “Confederation”so now I’m assuming this is a Star Trek universe if the Confederates won the Civil War. Interesting change but also a bit unnecessary. A big one is also the change of cast. While Adrienne, Courtney and Gary Graham remained in the cast, few others didn’t and they got killed off either off-screen or on-screen in a poor fashion.

I hate to say this and I really do but The Requiem, Part 1 might be close enough to the least-favorite thing I’ve seen happening to the franchise and at least I say “close enough” because if the guidelines didn’t change and most of the cast didn’t quit, who knows if what I said is definite or not. The storyline may be interesting and some casting performances is fine but the changes put me off big time. It also got worst when there’s a Catina Bar-like sequence with Robert Beltran making the most pointless cameo as either Chakotay or somebody else but holding the gun and having one line before he literally disappeared.

Suffice to say, I don’t know what to say about the second part when it aired. I also have a sense of predictability regarding Chekov’s character and what happens next but if I’m the reviewer who defends Into Darkness despite it being criticized for a character being whitewashed and The Wrath of Khan similarlities, then I’m also the reviewer who can’t defend Star Trek: Renegades for taking the following words “Star Trek” off the title.

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